45 to 40: The Traveler

When we first met in Provo in 1978 I don’t think either of us had an inkling of what lay in store for us and our future together. Like any youthful souls, we had idealistic hopes and dreams. Of course, our main goal after being engaged was getting married, starting a family and finishing college.

Little did we know in July 1979, as we were bound together in loving matrimony, that we would have a future filled with the wonder of travel. For me, by the time I was 22 and married, I had already lived in five states and six cities. I had traveled to Canada twice on band trips.  Julianne, on the other hand, had grown up and lived in Mesa, Arizona all of her life. The majority of her travels had been to Utah for family gatherings and to California to stay with her oldest sister Kathy.  She did make a cross country trip in 1978 with the BYU Orchestra, which also went into Toronto and on to Washington, D.C.

Our first road trip together, during our honeymoon, was to Monument Valley in southern Utah in 1979.

After vacillating to determine my  college direction, I ultimately settled on a dual major in Asian History and Geography at Northern Arizona University. I probably followed my heart more than my brain. My original plan was to become an attorney, but various things along the way led me to choose a different path. Admittedly, my sweet wife was not happy with my change in direction, but, thankfully stuck with me all these years, even though the “what ifs” have often crept into both of our minds at times.

We later visited Monument Valley with the family in 1993

Family visiting Abraham Lincoln home in Springfield, IL in the late 1990s

As I look back today, I honestly believe that following the path we chose has enabled us to have a life rich in experiences. We have never had the riches that many lawyers enjoy, but I think we provided our children opportunities and memories that few American children, especially those born in the 1980s, ever got to experience.

By 1987, we had the opportunity to live and work in Japan. Our children went to Japanese public schools, got to be in numerous TV commercials, were in local TV shows, learned a new language and culture and all that came with that.   They were enlightened with a mindset of diversity and global thinking.  And I am grateful for that.

The family in Oita Prefecture in Japan in 1989, visiting with Governor Morihiko Hiramatsu, who I worked for.

The family visiting the Usa Shrine, one of Japan’s famous Shinto Shrines.

My Dad visited us in Japan in 1991 and we went to Kyoto, where we visited the Kinkaku-ji (The Gold Pavilion)

Julianne and David, visiting the old Tulum ruins in Mexico as part of a cruise.

At the age of 20, I don’t think Julianne would have believed anyone if she were told she would live in Japan for four and a half years and have the opportunity to visit places in Canada and Mexico while also traveling to most of the 50 United States, including Hawaii and Alaska.  But, that we did.  We enjoyed many opportunities to travel together and continue to do so to this day.

Japan was quite the culture shock for Julianne initially.  The weather was different, the people were different, the language was strange and many of the foods she was offered were a bit more than unique.  But, like our children, she learned to love the land and the culture, became engaged and conversant in Japanese and really found great pleasure in the variety of unique dishes in Japanese cuisine, as well as the Japanese take on other ethnic foods.  To this day, all of us enjoy the variety of foods from all over the world.

Julianne enjoys some real ramen with Marissa and Chelsea at a small Mom and Pop ramen shop in Japan in  June 1988

We still enjoy good food. Here we visited Koreana, a local Korean restaurant with my cousin Lew and his daughter.

Visiting the Mystic Pizza shop in Mystic, Connecticut

Over the past 15 years or so, we have traveled all over the United States.  At one time, we had Amaree living in Montana and then they moved to Port Orchard, Washington.  Seth got his first job out of college and lived just north of Cincinnati, but job changes eventually took him and his family to Connecticut and later to Houston.  This meant opportunities to travel for visits.  These became long trips that afforded us the opportunity to see many new places.

Then, in 2017, we had a giant family reunion that began in Kentucky and eventually took most of us as far east as central New York.

Watching the grandkids on the beach at Old Orchard Beach in Maine.

Visiting the Field Museum in Chicago with family

Julianne and I at the Corn Palace in Mitchell, South Dakota

Travel in Virginia

Visiting the Washington Monument in Washington D.C.

We were able to check out glaciers in Glacier Bay National Park in Alaska

With family in West Virginia

Julianne on a canoe trip with Chelsea and her family on the Little Miami River in Ohio

On a visit to Washington, we got to see Mt. Rainier National Park

Chelsea and Julianne at Letchworth State Park in Castille, New York

Visiting Antique Archaeology, famous for the TV show American Pickers in Le Claire, Iowa

Julianne having fun on the beach with grandchildren in Hilton Head, South Carolina

Enjoying the grandeur of Glacier National Park in Montana

Visiting Pittsburgh on a recent trip to visit her sister

Travel runs in our veins.  Julianne may not like the long road trips that I enjoy (as do many of my children and grandchildren), but she still loves to travel.  Annually she has a sibling trip to San Diego where she spends her time in a family time share on the Pacific coast.  And now that her sister Laura is closer, we make occasional trips to Pennsylvania or meet Laura and her family in Ohio or West Virginia.

I am grateful that we have had so many adventures and memories.  I hope for even more to come.

Enjoying the beach in San Diego with her sisters Maren, Kathy and Laura

Do you like travel? Are you aware that I currently have two books about offbeat and quirky places?  You can use these to take on your road trips. You can see both of my books at http://amzn.to/2ks6fQZ. Working on Book 3, coming in late Spring 2019!!

46 to 40: La Cucaracha

Julianne grew up in Mesa, Arizona.  Turns out that her house was notorious for being a haven for “sewer roaches.” This particular breed of cockroach is actually an Oriental cockroach and is the most water-dependent of the roaches.  In Arizona they like to hang out in the more moist areas of the desert, breeding in the sewers.  Thus the name “sewer roach.”

I first experienced cockroaches when visiting Mesa for the first time when Julianne saw one and asked me to kill it.  Easy enough.  But there are lots of them and I got tired of killing them.  At an early stage in our marriage she made me promise to kill all of the bugs.  I vowed to do so and have pretty well kept that promise.

Cockroaches anyone?

Well, one day, while I was a student at ASU and we were living in Julianne’s parent’s house (they were in South Africa on an LDS Mission), Julianne was in the back taking a shower.  Suddenly, I heard her screaming and she was soon running out of the shower wet and naked screaming, “A sewer roach just crawled up my leg!! Get it off!.”  It was a horrifying moment for her.  We got the roach taken care of and moved on.  But, this story has become family lore and our children, having taken the prankster role as they learned from their mother, decided to pull a huge prank a few years ago.

Hiding cockroaches

A plastic cockroach that Julianne stuck on a thermostat at Amaree’s house during a Christmas visit a few years ago.  This was apparently the real culprit that started the cockroachery.

UPDATE: After speaking with Amaree, apparently, Julianne was the one that started this by putting plastic cockroaches in Aaron’s bed when Aaron (her fiance at the time) was visiting us in Kentucky.  So, Amaree and Aaron took the same and stuck a cockroach in the asparagus and Julianne apparently screamed when she saw it.  The following is Amaree’s revenge:

Julianne never knows where she will find a cockroach hidden

The real culprits, as we learned later, were Amaree and her family.  They had come for a visit from Montana, where they lived at the time, and they brought back an “infestation” with them. Apparently, one of the days, when Julianne was out of the house, they pulled out a bag with dozens of realistic-looking plastic cockroaches, that actually resemble Arizona’s sewer roaches.  They commenced to secreting them away in diverse places around the house for Julianne to discover both while they were still visiting and then, for months to come.  The “gift that kept on giving” if you will….  Supposedly, there are over 50 of them still hidden around the house…

 

She runs across the little critters in all sorts of places

In her shoes

In her socks

In her bath salts (notice, this one was in the “Take It Easy” bath salts – how rejuvenating!)

In the bottoms of drinking bottles

She finds handfuls

And handfuls…

And even has collected a plateful (Yum!)

So, in 2017, Julianne decided to fight back, bug to bug, by sending cockroach pillows to each of the kids and grandkids.  This is what we got back via Facebook:

Amaree now has a pet

Aaron, a sleeping partner

The Noe kids have a Noe Cockroach now

Jorge loves to eat with his…

And so does Rockwell

A whole different meaning to cuddlebug!!

One Christmas we got the perfect book to read to the grandkids:

Yes, a book about a cockroach

And the cockroach fun didn’t stop there.  Amaree, in all of her creative cockroachery, found the perfect gift for Julianne’s birthday in 2018.  Yes, a cockroach pillow.  (I wanted to upload the video from my phone, but it is apparently too big.)

Julianne loves her Cockroach Pillow. Sits proudly on the couch (until guests come by)  Blurry because I had to pull it from the video I couldn’t upload

And it like the elusive cockroaches that don’t go away, for Christmas, she got a board game…with, you guessed it, cockroaches.

I guess she will always have bugs in the kitchen…

There are even times that the cockroachery goes to new levels.  Julianne got a late mother’s day gift from her daughter Amaree just last week.  Just what she needed!  Roach Clips!!

Julianne and her new collection of Roach Clips — May 2019

Well, in closing, I would like to add a little cockroachery of my own.  Way before the days I met Julianne, this little ditty by Jack Blanchard and Misty Morgan (famous for The Tennessee Birdwalk) was being played on a few radio stations and, most certainly by one of my heroes of the late 1960s, Dr. Demento.  Little did I know back then that I would be dealing with cockroachery in my future married years. Enjoy The Cockroach Stomp

Kill Kill Kill 
Everybody do the Cockroach Stomp. 
California, Tennessee, and Louisville,
Come on, do the Cockroach Stomp. 
1 and 2 and 3 and 4, 
Stomp your partner on the floor. 
Squish squish. squish, squish, squish. 
Find a bug, 
Make a wish.

47 to 40: Julianneisms – Part 2

In my previous post, I talked about Julianneisms, funny things that Julianne has said over the years, new phrases she has coined and more.  In this second part, I will continue, but will focus more on how she changes songs, how she has integrated some into her life and more.

Julianne has always been musical, but, in the form of Julianneisms, she has taken music to a new level of some kind. For this particular post, I did a survey among our children and they have come up with some good ones.

One of Amaree’s photos near her high school graduation

The first comes from when our daughters Amaree and Marissa in high school in Jessamine County.  They were in the choir and there was one concert where they were singing a Zulu spiritual titled Siyahamba.  The original lyrics go as follows:

Siyahamba ekukhanyeni kwenkos
Siyahamb ekukhanyenu kwenkos

Well, that evening Julianne began singing the following and it has almost always become a Christmas tradition for her to “request” that the kids sing it as follows:

“See a ham, banana cookie crackers
See a ham banana cookie crackers

And thus, we are off on a roll…or at least on crackers.

A Christmas Smile – when she tries to get the kids to sing Silent Night

Speaking of Christmas traditions, Julianne has carried on a traditional “non-tradition” for the family each Christmas.  For nearly two decades, at every Christmas she will say

Let’s all gather in a circle and light candles and sing Silent Night

And, like a good tradition, the kids have always kind of done the “Let’s don’t and say we did” kind of thing.  So, it has become a traditional non-tradition to not gather in a circle with candles and sing Silent Night at Christmas time.  But, we can always expect the request from Julianne to do so.

 

Taking care of children in Japan. She is with Seth and Marissa here.

Switching gears, Julianne really dislikes any kind of potty humor.  But, ironically, in my survey with the kids, our son Seth had this to say…and it is so true…

You know…I’m now realizing that for a woman so against potty humor, Mom sure talked about poop and butts a lot.

One song she has sung to the kids since the earliest days of our first child Amaree, is a song that has been around a while.  However, it fits in well with her Julianneisms…

I see your hiney, all white and shiny
If you don’t hide it, I’m gonna bite it.

And then she went on with another lyric that included the words “I’m gonna chew it.” But alas, as far as I know, Julianne has never bitten or chewed any of the kids’ hineys, despite the 30 some odd years of threats to do so.

Young sassy Chelsea Dawn — “you WILL NOT spank my little bottom Mom!”

But, rhyming away, in a sing-sing fashion, she has also recited the following (which I also posted in the previous post, but am including here in the hiney-loving tradition):

Spank that bottom!  Spank it hard! Spank that little tub of lard! Spank it hard! Spank it fast! Spank that boy right on the ask me no more questions and I’ll tell you more no lies…”

Another “poop”  related song Julianne wants to attribute to me.  But, you know what, I’ll let her have all of the credit and glory. Having been adults in the 70s, we heard a great deal of music from the famed Swedish group ABBA.  One of their songs, Super Trouper, became a regular in our household, especially around diaper changing time.  The lyrics of the Julianneismized version go as follows:

All of the grandkids, even Landen, would laugh at the Super Pooper song now

You’re a Super Pooper, pooping up your panties, pooping all day long…pooping really strong…you’re a super pooper girl (or boy — depending on was doing the Super Pooping).

Of course, she would then call the kids her ” Poopinstinkin’ ”  – another Julianneism dictionary word.

Then came along the age of iPods and music MP3s.  With the iPod, Julianne could collect her set of songs.  By the early 2000s, Julianne had developed a playlist for cleaning and doing chores.  She apparently loves cleaning as the first song was always Fallin’ by Alicia Keys.  Just imagine Julianne singing that first “I keep on fallin’ in and out of love with you.”  Almost 19 years later she STILL sings this song as she begins her chores.

But Alicia Keys was not the only one.  She also popularized a Lady Gaga remake by The Chipmunks and would be caught singing along to Bad Romance….  Yes, I have a video of Julianne singing it, but I also want to live a few years longer.  But believe me, it COULD go viral!!  Just imagine her singing this….

Julianne and Laura have their own kind of sing-songy Sister Speak. Really…

And finally, in a musical sort of way, whenever Julianne and her sister Laura get together, they kind of have their own “Sister talk” style.  It is kind of sing-songy way of talking.  They don’t talk that way to others, only to each other.  It has been going on for as long as I have known them.  Yes, it is peculiar, but, we all create our own mannerisms over the years, and Julianne has her peculiar Julianneisms. That was what makes her special and endearing to all.

49 to 40: The Hiker

In my previous post I wrote about Julianne the biker.  She loves being outdoors and enjoying nature.  Biking is an activity I can easily do with her.  But, in recent years, due to knee issues, taking nice nature hikes with Julianne is a bit more difficult.  But that doesn’t stop her as she will go with daughters, grandchildren and often even solo on hikes. Where possible, when the hikes are “easy” (meaning not too many hills, etc.), I try to join her.  But, she is happy when she is out there, even on her own.

Hiking is something that we have done throughout our marriage.  I was never brought up in the camping tradition, and so I have not been a very good camper.  But, hiking was something I did with my dad and Julianne also did a lot of hiking.  As our children grew, we would take them on hikes.

Julianne and David with first daughter Amaree on a winter hike near the San Francisco Peaks, Flagstaff, AZ 1980

After we arrived in Japan in the late 1980s, we were afforded the opportunity to take many hikes.  There are many antiquities, old statues and beautiful nature hikes in Japan.  We took advantage of these.

Julianne and David with children on a hike to the Usuki Magaibutsu in Oita Prefecture, Japan 1988

We continued on hikes into the 1990s.  After Amaree was married, we all went to Montana and did a few fun hikes there. We enjoyed seeking out a nice waterfall with children and grandchildren.

David and Julianne with Grandson Kade at a waterfall in Montana

David and Julianne hiked to a waterfall near Juneau, Alaska

Of course, the hiking has continued, even as recently as May 2019.  Here are more shots of Julianne on hikes…enjoying nature, time with children and grandchildren and the great outdoors.

Julianne getting ready to hike the Double Arch Trail in Red River Gorge.

Hiking with grandkids in Watkins Glen, NY

Hiking in West Virginia with a view of the New River Gorge Bridge in the background.

Hiking a trail with granddaughter Autumn

A small hike in Glacier National Park in 2005 with son Seth and a friend of Amaree’s

Hiking with the Noe grandkids in Kentucky

Julianne loves hiking in the Red River Gorge in Kentucky

Julianne and David on a short hike at Letchworth State Park in New York

Julianne in her element hiking lovely trails

 

 

55 to 40: The Violinist

Julianne has an assortment of talents, many which I’ll cover in later posts. Perhaps one of her most recognized talents is her finesse at the violin.

I remember with fondness hearing her play “Meditation “ by Thais every time we would visit her home in Mesa.  It was her Dad’s favorite and has become one of mine as well.  Indeed, in my mind, it is Julianne’s Theme Song.

Julianne grew up in a family that emphasized music and began the violin in the fourth grade. By high school she was a very talented violinist and,.  She was in the Mesa Symphony.  She went on to Northern Arizona University on a music scholarship.  Later, she played in the Mormon Youth Symphony and the Utah Valley Symphony in Provo, Utah.  It was during her time in these two that I met and eventually married this talented musician.

Julianne playing violin for daughters Amaree and Marissa in the 1980s. Featured in a newspaper in Mesa, AZ

Julianne has played violin for many family, church and social functions

We eventually moved to Flagstaff, where I attended college.and Julianne was able to play in the Flagstaff Symphony Orchestra. Ironically, at that time, a violinist named Daniel Mason was the concertmaster. In the 1990s, after moving to Kentucky, it turns out that Daniel Mason had become an Associate Professor of Violin at UK and Julianne took lessons from him.  Such a unique small world it is!

Julianne performing with her daughters, including Chelsea on the violin.  Christmas 1999

Due to Julianne’s love of music and the arts, her talents have carried on to two generations as her children have taken on musical talents and then passed them down to their children as well. Our oldest daughter Amaree graduated from UK with a music degree and is now conducting choirs and teaching piano in Washington. Marissa was an All-State Singer. Chelsea played the violin in high school and has since taught herself guitar and piano. Seth performed in choir in high school and was in the men’s choir at UK. He too has taught himself guitar. Solomon also has a fine singing voice, though his real talent was art (as was Marissa’s).

Amaree conducting a combined choir in 2019 honoring Armed Services Day — the LDS Stake Choir from her stake, the Unitarian Universalist Choir and the men of the West Sound Chorus

Our oldest grandchild played the Saxophone in the Fayette County Middle School Honors Band and will be in the bands in High School beginning in 2019

And, as mentioned above, many of our grandchildren carry on traditions as singers, a violinist, a cellist, a percussionist and a saxophone player. Two of the grandchildren also perform with the Lexington ballet.

Our oldest grandchild Autumn has taken up the saxophone (and Grampz is happy about that since he too was a sax player).  She has thrived.
Amaree’s three oldest are all becoming talented musicians as they each perform well on their respective instruments.
I credit this love of music and the arts to my sweetheart who has sought to engage her children at every opportunity.
Indeed, I am honored, blessed and grateful to be married to such a talented musician who has dedicated much of her life in nurturing a love of music to her children and grandchildren.  This was an unforeseen blessing in my life.

Amaree’s three oldest – Kade on percussion, Livvy on violin and Charles on Cello.

Marissa’s daughter Joselyn has thrived in ballet and has performed with the professional Lexington Ballet Troupe for nearly five years.

Marissas youngest, Lyla, is also now beginning ballet and performed in the Lexington Ballet Nutcracker in 2018

 

58 to 40: She is fun-loving

Julianne is fun-loving.  In fact, I might even say she can be goofy at times, but NOT in the Post Title (of course).  Our daughter Amaree even has nick-named her “Nuttiness.”  And sometimes it fits.

Julianne is not obnoxious.  She is also not very outspoken or gregarious (like her husband).  But, she has a goofy side.   I think that our children picked up their “goofy” sides from her.   I am just not as goofy…or am I?

Typical fun with Julianne photobombing

Dracula Teeth

One of my first memories of her goofiness was when she was having a Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup and then put the brown wrapper over her teeth. Or the “Orange Peel Smile.”  One time our daughter caught her using spaghetti to make Dracula teeth…

She has done funny teeth things with pistachio shells too.  You never know what she may come up with.

I got the biggest kick out of her a couple of years ago when she had to create a poster for a graphic arts class at the University of Kentucky.  This poster is a prime example of her “creative goofiness.”  I had to include it here.  She did ALL of the art work…including the characterization of herself from actual photos….

Julianne is notorious for her photo-bombs and funny faces in photos.  Here are a couple of them from the past.

Photobomb 2 (upper right) — yes, the kids get it from her!

Selfie with Seth

Photobomb 3

A couple of Christmas seasons ago, we went around Lexington to take Christmasy pictures together.  She insisted on hiding her face in each one..just for fun.

Where is Julianne?

Where is Julianne?

Where is Julianne?

Always a master of disguise, she is happy to hide herself in plain site.

Aha!!!

Hidden in plain site….

It is absolutely fun being with these sweet, fun-loving, sometimes downright goofy gal!!  Love her to death (and life)!!  Life with her is Happyville!

A Week of Gratitude 2018 – Part 3: The Journey With My Family

David in 1974…age 18

By the time I was ready to depart on the solo part of my journey, at the age of 17, I had already determined a few things regarding my future. Having grown up with a good deal of dysfunction and unhappiness in my own adoptive family, I had determined that if I ever had a family of my own, that kind of dysfunction and heartache would not happen on my watch. I am not saying that everything in my family was bad, but there were many things that just weren’t right and I wanted to make sure I fixed these things for my own offspring, if I was ever blessed to have one.

Starting our family journey in 1980 in Flagstaff, AZ
David at age 60

Now, at age 62, I am thankful to say that, overall, we have had a loving family and I believe that most of my resolutions in terms of family pretty much came true. My children have not had to experience a divorce between their parents. My children were loved and nurtured and had a fairly stable family. Unlike my situation where my parents never came to any of my school activities (other than my high school graduation and later my college graduation), my wife and I strived to attend as many activities of our children as we could possibly do. To be sure, there were times where three different functions occurred simultaneously, and thus one of the children had to miss out on parents being there.  But, but if we could be there, we were.

Family in Japan in late 1980s
Julianne and I were blessed with five wonderful children throughout the first years of our marriage. Soon all of our children will be over the age of 30 and it is hard to believe that we have children approaching the age of 40. I really don’t feel that old.
My fun family!
My Wonderful Family – 1993

I am grateful that my children have had so many wonderful life experiences prior to their departures on their own separate life journeys. I’m grateful that for at least 17 or 18 years of their lives they were able to join Julianne and I on our journey as we lived in Japan, lived in different parts of the country, and had many opportunities provided for us to travel, participate in many activities and do many things that most families never really get to do.

Hanging with oldest daughter Amaree
Having fun with my second child, Marissa
Goofing around with third child Chelsea
Trying to be as handsome as my first son, fourth child Seth
Trying to remain youthful with our youngest child, Solomon
The family visiting Mesa, AZ

We have never had a “rich” life in terms of money, and that has been perfectly okay. We’ve never been dirt poor either. We have always been blessed to have what we needed and sometimes even a little bit more. Our children never did without the necessities of life and for that I am deeply grateful. My children never had to have their heads shaved like my mom used to do. She gave us our haircuts and I didn’t like it. If our children desired that kind of haircut, then it was fine even though I still did not like how they looked.  Fortunately, I believe that we were very good about allowing our children to make guided choices during their youth.

My Wonderful Family – 2012
Thanks to the amazing talents of my wife in so many areas, our children grew up to have many talents themselves. They were all musical. Most of them have been creative in one way, shape or form, whether it be graphic arts or some other form of creativity.
The whole family in prime form – July 2017!
Four of my children have found wonderful spouses whom they love and who love them in return. Those “in-law” kids are definitely an important part of our family. These children have also brought forth their own children, our grandchildren. By the time I was 60, I already had 10 grandchildren. When I left home at age 17, the thought of grandchildren barely crossed my mind. It was all I could think of to just have a wife and my own small family someday. And, I was certainly blessed with abundance. As it says in Proverbs, “children are like arrows… happy is the man that has his quiver full of them.” And I most certainly have a quiver full and I am definitely happy.
Earlier group photo of family
I am grateful for the love my children have for their parents and I am grateful thankful for the togetherness that each of them shares with one another. Like any siblings, they have had their differences. But, when we have family gatherings, there is togetherness. For us, “the family that stays together, STAYS together.” When we have issues, the children are there to discuss them and share them. They call each other, they share time with each other, they carry on family traditions such as calling and singing happy birthday. It is a joy to this old man to see the evolution of my five children and ultimately my 10 sweet grandchildren.
A composite of me with all of my grandchildren in 2012 and then again, same pose in 2017.
And what can I say about my grandchildren.? They all bring me so much happiness and joy. I am glad that I don’t have to raise them every day, so I get them most of the time when they are in a good mood. But it is a joy to spend time with these amazing children. I have been blessed to be able to spend some quality time with many of them. I’ve been able to share the adventures of traveling on the back roads with most of them. My children and grandchildren will all learn diversity. They will all know the wonders of this world. Hopefully they will appreciate and enjoy those times spent with Julianne and me.
Joined my granddaughter Autumn in the tradition of a Thanksgiving “Turkey Hat”
Fun with grandchild #2 – Kade Matthews
Goofing off with #3 – Charles Matthews
Spreading sunshine with #4 – Joselyn Noe
Bright smiles with #5 Landen Noe
Cuddling with #6 – Olivia “Livvy” Matthews
Having fun with #7 – Rockwell Kravetz
Sharing a flamingo moment with #8 – Lyla Noe
Playing (as always) with the carefree #9 – Benson Matthews
Enjoying Grampz time with #10 – Samuel Kravetz
Don’t get me wrong. Raising our children has not been an easy task either. Each of them has brought challenges to my wife and myself. Each of my children has made decisions that we did not necessarily agree with. But as we grow older, we learned to support our children and their decisions and to love them unconditionally, as best as we were able. And that love has been reciprocated back in abundance. I am deeply grateful for that.
I love playing with my grandchildren
Hanging with the Grandkidz at the Wigwams in Cave City, KY. Yes, we stayed there!
I feel rich

And now, 45 years after I had left my own home and set forth on my personal journey and traveled these many years on this journey with my family, I feel “rich“ in the abundance of family. I feel rich in joy and experiences. I have had a rich life because of my children and my grandchildren and this will be something I will be able to always have with me.

Bottom line… My life has been wonderfully blessed and that is why I am “awesome, but getting better” everyday.

Crossing Paths – A Julianne Story

Julianne as a toddler

I was a three-year-old boy in Albuquerque New Mexico when she was born in Mesa, Arizona. By the time she was five, I was on my way to Dallas, Texas with my family. By the time she was ten, I was learning the ropes as a junior high student in the Denver area. As she grew to the age of 15 and had begun her high school years, I had already traveled to Bozeman, Great Falls and was a senior in high school in Murray, Utah. By this time, she had become a very talented violinist. I had learned the saxophone.

She grew up in the same home most of her life with her loving family and her many friends throughout her elementary, junior high and high school days. I had moved often and always had to find new friends new places.

Julianne as a young girl (look at those curls)

The Bateman family early on.  Julianne on the left.

Julianne at Church Camp with friends (I think she is the one in front)

She was born in raised into her church, the church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Not me. Through all of these years I went from being born Catholic, being raised a Jewish boy for the first few years, then attending Jehovah’s Witness Kingdom Halls, and ultimately finding my way into the same church as her

As she was studying hard in high school, I had made my way to Japan to serve as a missionary for the Church.

Bateman Siblings

By the time I returned home, she had graduated high school and made her way to Brigham Young University. I had returned from Japan and also made my way to Brigham Young University. We both had hopes and dreams.

It was not until the fall of 1978, about 40 years ago, that our paths finally crossed. It’s really funny how things happen like this.

My old 1963 yucky green Volkswagen bug had died on me as I prepare to head to work as shoe salesman at JC Penney in Orem, Utah. I made my way to a bus stop so that I could get to work. I needed my job. That day, she also made her way to the bus stop to go to work. She too worked at JCPenney, in the little café, as a waitress. Even then, while working at the same place, our paths never crossed until this auspicious day in the fall of 1978. Having never ridden the bus to work, I did not know what the bus schedule was, but found that as I arrived at the bus stop, I missed the bus. She arrived just a couple minutes later only to find out for me, that she too had missed the bus. But, as fate would have it, I was enamored by this pretty young lady with long flowing brown hair and a gleaming smile who I just miss this bus with me. 

Our first photo together ca. 1978

She was friendly, and called one of her roommates to come pick us up to take us to work. I was grateful for that. But, I was also in love. Instantaneously in love. I knew at the moment we met at the bus stop, she was the one.  But I was shy, yes, an outgoing person, but shy in terms of the opposite sex. She too was somewhat shy, but friendly.  Interestingly enough, we did not introduce ourselves as this was just a chance meeting where our paths have crossed and she was being helpful to get me to the same location she had to go to anyway.

My interest was piqued as I knew she worked in the same place. Soon I was visiting the little café on a daily basis to order cherry cheesecake. My real reason was to observe this fine young lady whose name I still did not know.

Julianne ca. 1978

Then, one day I went in and she was gone. She had left to return home to Arizona. My glimmer of hope had disappeared. And I still did not know her name!

I spent the holiday in Utah wondering about her and if she would return and if I would ever see her again. I made my way down to Jemez Springs, New Mexico to celebrate Christmas with the remnants of my family. Divorce had happened. Challenges happened for my siblings. But, for once, we did get all together to celebrate the one day.

But this story is about Julianne…not me.

I returned to Provo late in December and continued my job. She was not there. She never did return to JCPenney.

School began again and it was back to search mode for me as I strived to find my soulmate. And then it happened! In the midst of the very crowded student center at BYU, I heard a “Hey you!“ called out. I looked. It was her! She had returned and our paths crossed again!! At that point, she did not know my name and I did not know hers. But I made sure this time that would not happen again. I gave her my name, I got her name and her phone number and the rest is history.

Marriage Photo….one of the happiest days of my life

Over the years, this birthday girl who is born when I was three just a few hundred miles away from me, became my wife and the mother of our five children. It was not easy. I took many hours of school and worked. She was left home alone almost all the time to raise these young children. I helped when I could, but she took the biggest load on her shoulders and that continued for many years.

Julianne and me with our first three…all girls..(L to R) Amaree, Chelsea and Marissa.  Julianne made the dresses

Julianne Bateman was now my wife and was an exceptional mother to our children. Unlike many married couples, we had our times of separation for long periods of time. These were job related and not relationship related. 

Family in Japan in late 1980s

I can safely say that my schooling and work was a form of separation, but at least I tried to be home most evenings to spend time with her. She was the love of my life. And I adored our children.

Family Fun

Now together, we eventually made our way to Flagstaff where our first three children were born and I struggled through school and jobs. After graduation, we moved down to “the valley” to attend school in Tempe at Arizona State University where I would seek my masters degree. Once again, I was almost always gone while she stayed home and took care of the children.

Family in Japan in 1987.  We lived in this building.

Our first real extended separation happened in 1987 when I had an opportunity to go to Japan to work. I left in July and left her alone for nearly a month with our children. At this time we had four children and she was pregnant with her fifth and, bless her heart, she had to fly to Japan alone with those children. She flew via soul Korea and their flight was late and she missed the flight to Nagoya and Fukuoka. She was stuck in a foreign country, pregnant with four little children. Ultimately, the next day she did make her way into Japan and I was able to meet her and we had a joyous reunion.

The family in Japan

But, Julianne did not speak the language and I was always gone to work. Once again, she was left alone most of the time to deal with the challenges of life in a foreign country where she did not understand language, the customs or even the ways to purchase food. But she was strong, and she learned and she excelled.

Taking care of children in Japan. She is with Seth and Marissa here.

She had to have her fifth child in a foreign country. She had to deal with a child who got severely burned and had to go spend a few days in a Japanese hospital. She had to manage all of these things on her own predominately due to my work.

We finally made it back to the United States in 1991. It was a challenging time for us as finding potential employment was difficult. After nine months of searching, I finally found a temporary job in Kentucky and once again, I had to leave her alone with five children. But this time, it was for eight months. This was before the days of cell phones, or FaceTime. Our only form of communication was a regular telephone, once a day. But she courageously struggled through that time while I worked far away to provide for our family. During that eight months, I only returned home once, during the holidays, for three or four days and then had to return to Kentucky.

The family visiting Mesa, AZ

Finally, in 1992 we were all able to be together again in Kentucky. But it was not the last time that separation would happen. Jobs came and went, and I eventually worked for eight months living Woodstock, Ontario. Once again, I left her alone to take care of things. By this time three of our children were already married and we had grandchildren. Only one of our children remained at home. She too had a job.

The years after our children left, the empty nest years, I have finally been able to see this sweet lady who has stuck with me for all these years blossom and become her self. For all these many years, she has sacrificed to take care of children, often times alone for long periods of time.

Our family in Lexington, KY around 1995 or 1996

Julianne, who celebrates her birthday this day, is strong and determined. For those many years raising children and being alone or having to get through all of the things that have to be done as a mother, she never got to be herself like she wanted.

Always happy

The whole family in prime form – July 2017 — includes all ten grandchildren and 4 spouses

I am proud of her and am thrilled to see her finally have the opportunity, like a century plant, to finally get her day blossoming. Becoming the beautiful and strong person that she now is and having to have withheld that for all of these years, Has probably been very difficult for her.

Julianne with our five children on my 60th birthday

Julianne and sisters November 2018 – (L-R – Maren, Kathy, Laura, Julianne)

Through all of this, from the day where our paths crossed 40 years ago, there are times where I worry that our paths are separating again. Not because of hate, or desire to separate, but because she has finally had the opportunity to be independent and blossom on her own and find her self. We are a new stage where we must find that sweet spot in our paths that helps us have that crossing again.

Julianne at her birthday celebration in Nov. 2018. (Look at those curls again!)

This person is the love of my life. I am so grateful for her. So honored that she would have me stick with me and sacrifice all these years for the benefit of our children. She is a fun-loving joyous soul who has blessed my life beyond description. I can only pray and hope for more joyous years together with my sweet Julianne who celebrates her birthday this day.  I am so glad our paths crossed all those years ago.

Julianne and David – Nov 4, 2018

Countdown 365: #234 – 40th Anniversary of LDS Mission

My passport photo for my LDS Mission, taken in February 1976

My passport photo for my LDS Mission, taken in February 1976

There are some events in one’s life that are turning points…big decisions that impact the remainder of one’s life.  Today I celebrate the 40th Anniversary of one of those events.  It was 40 years ago today that I entered the Language Training Mission (LTM) in Provo, Utah to learn Japanese and prepare to serve as an LDS Missionary in the Japan Nagoya Mission. This singular event would literally have a myriad impacts on the direction of my life, the life of my wife and of my children.

Prior to this event only three real others were as momentous…my mother taking me away from my father and moving to New Mexico (something that I had no control over but had a massive impact on my life), my decision to convert to the LDS Church in 1975 (and thus be asked to leave the house at age 17 as a result) and then the actual decision to serve versus the decision to take what would have been a high paying job in 1975.

Speaking at my Missionary Farewell in Murray, UT - Feb. 8, 1976

Speaking at my Missionary Farewell in Murray, UT – Feb. 8, 1976

Pondering life's choices as a young missionary

Pondering life’s choices as a young missionary

With each decision made at a crossroads in life (or a fork in the road of life if you prefer), a whole string of consequences unseen is set in motion (until the next crossroad, which then again leads to another set of unforeseen life events). But this mission to serve the Lord in Japan (not to mention all of the service to the Japanese people) had a profound impact on my life, my testimony, friends I have made and, ultimately my career choices. And, as I approach my 60th of year of life, I can look back and consider all of the things that WOULD NOT have occurred in my life had I not made that one decision. Honestly, I am awestruck.

Over the course of my mission I wrote over 1000 pages of journal entries.

Over the course of my mission I wrote over 1000 pages of journal entries and dozens of letters home to family and friends.

So, on February 12, 1976 I was taken to Provo and it began.  I wrote on Page 1 of the first of my many journals about this event:

“Today was my first day.  It was really great. We had many inspiring talks and learned much about the mission and mission fields.  Elder Stewart Simons from Cyprus High and Elder Marc White from Murray were my fist companions. Elder Marc and I went to school together, so its a real blessing. Its been a tough, long, hot day, but a very meaningful one.I’m so grateful to serve the Lord.”

My two LTM Companions as they looked in 1976. This was scanned from my Missionary Journal.

My two LTM Companions as they looked in 1976. This was scanned from my Missionary Journal.

Hanging with Elder White and Elder Simons at the Provo Temple on Feb. 18, 1976

Hanging with Elder White and Elder Simons at the Provo Temple on Feb. 18, 1976

I learned from both Elder Simons and Elder White.  It was nice to have one of them as someone I knew.  I was a stranger in a strange land.  Later on in Japan, Elder White became my zone leader and we grew very close.  We have stayed in touch casually over the years.  He was a real blessing to me.

Our LTM Group in Provo, UT

Our LTM Group in Provo, UT (L-R: Sister ?, Elder Bartholomew, Elder Bateman, Elder White, Elder Call, Elder Hadley, Elder Simons, Sister Hawley and me)

I was one of many in the group to enter the LTM that day.  The LTM was in an old Catholic School in Provo that the Church had purchased.  This was before the days of the Missionary Training Center (MTC) and just shortly after the days of the Japanese LTM being in Hawaii.

In my District I had four other Elders including Elder Bartholomew from Rancho Palace Verdes, CA; Elder Bateman from Edmonton, AB; Elder Hadley from Sandy, UT (who I am still in contact with after all these years); and Elder Call from Heber City, UT. (see the photo above)

On February 14, 1976 I wrote: “I am so happy that I’m here at this time to be able to work together with other elders and learn Japanese and the Gospel of our loving Father. The LTM is really an experience with 20 elders to a room, two districts to a room. I am really learning to love other elders. Especially those in my district and especially Elder White and Elder Simons. I’ve learned many new phrases and words.  Today we learned our testimony and a simple prayer.  I’m trying to memorize it, but its hard. I do have my testimony memorized.  I am praying muchly now so that I may be closer to the Lord.”

Being welcomed at Nagoya Airport by the Mission President Satoru Sato and his wife, along with some other Nagoya Elders already serving. April 14, 1976

Being welcomed at Nagoya Airport by the Mission President Satoru Sato and his wife, along with some other Nagoya Elders already serving. April 14, 1976

Boarding a train in Nagoya to head to my first branch in Kanazawa

Boarding a train in Nagoya to head to my first branch in Kanazawa

I could go on and on about the experience in the LTM.  It was a learning experience in so many ways. But, eventually it was over and on April 13, 1976 we all left for Nagoya, Japan.  I had never been on a 747 and never flown overseas. (I’ll actually write more about this on my Countdown Day #173).

During my missionary days I served in the Japan Sea side towns of Kanazawa, Fukui and Takaoka, as well as in Ogaki (near Gifu – where my daughter Amaree served part of her mission in 2001 and 2002), Nagoya and the lovely town of Fuji City at the base of Mt. Fuji.

I met an extraordinary number of wonderful Japanese Latter-day Saints and myriads of other lovely Japanese people.  I learned about Buddhism and Shintoism.  I learned and excelled at the language.  It was a wonderful experience.

Accompanying a blind investigator on a train. Like today, I almost always had a camera with me.

Accompanying a blind investigator on a train. Like today, I almost always had a camera with me.

Following are a few more photos from my mission.  I have hundreds. My first “selfie” is also included. My mission was a blessing in my life in so many years.  I am humbled and grateful to be celebrating the 40th Anniversary of beginning this amazing adventure and am really touched by all of the sweet memories flowing through my mind as I reflect back.

A few years ago we had a Missionary Reunion in Salt Lake City and I was able to catch up with many of those with whom I served during my two years from 1976-78.  It was wonderful to catch up with them and see where their lives had taken them. Some have been very successful, others not so much.  Some of those with whom I served have gone inactive or even left the LDS Church.  These things happen.  But, I cherish the friendships and, even today, stay in touch with many of these former missionaries (Thank you Facebook!!), even those that are no longer associated with the church.  A mission does amazing things to one’s life.

Always writing and pondering.

Always writing and pondering. Ogaki, Japan 1977

My first companion in the field, Elder Fullmer from Utah. This was in Kanazawa in April 1976

My first companion in the field, Elder Fullmer from Utah. This was in Kanazawa in April 1976 (Dig those 70’s era neckties!!)

Riding a train - an almost daily occurrence in Japan

Riding a train – an almost daily occurrence in Japan

My fist selfie! Took this in the mirror at a barber shop after the bird landed on my shoulder.

My fist selfie! Took this in the mirror at a barber shop after the bird landed on my shoulder.

Fooling around with the Ogaki Elders in 1977

Fooling around with the Ogaki Elders in 1977

With Elders and some members in Takaoka, Japan in the winter of 1976

With Elders and some members in Takaoka, Japan in the winter of 1976

Lazing in bed on a cold morning (we had no heaters - just oil stoves that had to be turned off at night). This was in Fuji City in January 1978

Lazing in bed on a cold morning (we had no heaters – just oil stoves that had to be turned off at night). This was in Fuji City in January 1978

On top of Mt. Fuji, April 1978, just before I left for home.

On top of Mt. Fuji, April 1978, just before I left for home.

Street "Dendo" (Proselyting) in Ogaki, Japan in 1977. I wrote all of the Japanese on the poster while dressed in the Yukata

Street “Dendo” (Proselyting) in Ogaki, Japan in 1977. I wrote all of the Japanese on the poster while dressed in the Yukata

With companion Elder Lee Richan. We had become very close friends. He passed away a couple of years ago (2013)

With companion Elder Lee Richan. We had become very close friends over the years. He passed away a couple of years ago (2013)

The busy Mormon Missionary on a hot summer day in Japan in 1977

The busy Mormon Missionary on a hot summer day in Japan in 1977

 

Countdown 365: #247 – Benson Matthews

Benson and Grampz September 2015

Benson and Grampz September 2015

Today is my grandson Benson’s birthday. This little guy has been amazing in his young four years of life!

Little Bensi was born with a heart defect and ended up having to have a couple of surgeries in the very early days of his life in order to save him. Ultimately he had changes to his heart so that he would be able to live and grow and that he has done for sure! And boy does he have a heart!!

Benson just before his heart surgery in 2012

Brave Benson just before his heart surgery in 2012

Benson July 2015

Benson July 2015

Always smiling!

Always smiling!

The first couple of years for Benson have not been easy but he made it through.  And, unless you knew that he had already had an operation, you would never be able to tell by the way he acts, plays, or interacts with other people.

Unfortunately, because they live so far away, I have not been able to spend as much time with him or his brothers and sister as I would like. But we have had a couple of occasions where we were able to spend a good amount of time and last summer (2015) we got to spend 10 days in Washington with them.  What a fabulous time we had and what a joy it was to get to know Benson.

Benson Matthews 2015

Benson Matthews 2015

Benson with his Dad Aaron

Benson with his Dad Aaron

Cuddling with Benson

Cuddling with Benson

During our visit, I was able to see each of the grandchildren and was able to sit on a chair and cuddle with Benson.  I spent time reading him books and getting to know this young grandchild of mine.  Not shy at all, he would cuddle with me for an hour or two as I read, told jokes and played with him.

Benson is a sharp little boy and he also has an endearing smile. One might think that he is shy, but he certainly is not. He is very amenable to new people and new environments 9as far as I could tell).

As for his heart defect, I saw no evidence of it when we went to the beach as he ran hard and jumped into the water like his sister and brothers did. He was all about collecting seashells, little rocks, and digging big holes in the sand.

Jumping and running...Benson is unstoppable

Jumping and running…Benson is unstoppable

Fun with Grampz 2015

Fun with Grampz 2015

Climbing Away

Climbing Away

And he is not fearless either. He climbs playground equipment without a problem.

Benson is truly a blessing to my life, my wife’s life, and the lives of his parents and siblings. He is an example of courage and strength, and this despite his youthful four years of age.

Don’t get me wrong however. He can be a true four year old.  It is not beyond him to  be a prankster (like his mother!) and can be a little troublemaker. He may be angelic but sometime he’s not really an angel. Nevertheless, he is fun to watch and to be around. And for this, I am grateful that Benson is a part of my life and my posterity.

 

Benson in 2013

Benson in 2013

Benson and a budgie at Tacoma Zoo 2015

Benson and a budgie at Tacoma Zoo 2015

Always mother's little helper

Always mother’s little helper